Self-control generates success, something worth remembering as we start the new year.  Success, of course, means different things to different people.  Acquiring wealth is a measure of success to some while family, friends, creative pursuits, or service is the measure of success to others.  Our goals determine our sense of success.  To value family and never spend time with family can leave one feeling unsuccessful in spite of other accomplishments.  Many wealthy people have deemed themselves unsuccessful in the end as they sold their creative birthrights for economic porridge.  Nonetheless, self-control is an important factor in successfully reaching any goal.

Sellers of debauchery, of course, lie about self-control.  Commercials, TV shows, movies, and other pop culture mediums peddle unconstrained impulsiveness as the ultimate goal, often achieved by drunkenness or drug use.  In fact, the pop culture myth proclaims that success itself is achieved through unbridled spontaneity.  Successful entertainers do often score high on the impulsiveness scale, but many entertainers end up in trouble, financial or otherwise.  One may learn self-control and choose to be spontaneous in some settings as, of course, many successful entertainers do.  Those selling debauchery, by the way, use great self-control in marketing their products, reaching their own financial goals.

Self-control can be learned.  While no one should deny that chemical and/or biological factors can be involved in some self-control issues, not all issues of self-control can be reduced to chemistry and biology.  Cognitive and rational-emotive therapy insights point out that words and mental images are related to feelings, and thus skills can be taught to help creatively manage feelings.  Children with ADHD may need medication, but, being human, they also need self-control skills.  Spiritual as well as emotional growth comes from not responding automatically to mental images and words that pop into our head.  Many of our problems grow from not regarding self-control as an ideal to be sought.

The book of Proverbs in the Bible introduces us to a character called The Fool.  Many of us have had the unpleasant experience of reading Proverbs and discovering a mirror in which we were The Fool.  The Fool scoffs at wisdom, knowledge, truth, and self-control.  Realizing as a teenager that most of the characteristics of The Fool were my characteristics helped me mature--some at least.  Scoffing at self-control will lead to destruction.

In any successful endeavor, timing is everything.  Eating is necessary for life and can be a pleasurable experience, but self-control helps us eat wisely.  Spending money is necessary and some expenditures are for recreation, but self-control helps us avoid bankruptcy.  Financial success is to some extent necessary to live in our society, and self-control is the necessary component for financial success.  Even good things like family and friends can become destructive without self-control to help us manage time and relationships.

 Jesus said (Matthew 5:5) that a state of blessedness existed for the meek, but most of us don’t understand that the underlying idea is correctly expressed by the English word “self-control.”  The Greek word is one used for a wild horse with a bridle so that all the energy is controlled and directed.  Our word “meek” has connotations that lose the original meaning, and the alternate translation of “gentle” loses the meaning of controlled power.  Jesus said those who could channel their drives and energy would inherit the earth, and we might well consider this as we begin the new year.  Foolishness and impulsiveness can destroy us.