Everyone faces loss.  While the face of Christmas may be jolly, the heart of Christmas is often sad.  Old friends are gone, family is absent, times have changed, and one does not have to be old to experience such loss.  In childhood Christmas should mean joy, good food, family, and gifts.  However, some as children never experience the wonder of Christmas morning and the magic of Santa.  Such children mourn no loss as time steals childhood.  Still, such children are poorer, not richer.  To mourn is to be human, to care.  While something in us seeks to avoid pain, unsought pain gives birth to wisdom.  Loss focuses on the empty space and proclaims the worth of the missing.

Unless we experience loss, we cannot enter the sadness of others.  We have only sailed on the surface of life until some crashing wave sends us to the depths.  Only then do we understand that to enter another’s darkness is to love.  You will only discover your friends when you have lost everything, for most acquaintances will remain unconcerned and detached.  No experience in life is quite like being alone when your world disintegrates.  Only when you have mourned do you know how to comfort.

I once knew a child whose new bicycle constantly sported new scratches and dents.  The child blamed a friend and was angry.  One day he came in heartbroken, sobbing.  He had suddenly realized that he, not his friend, was denting and scratching his new bicycle.  He had seen himself, lost his innocence, and he mourned the loss.  Although painful, his new understanding freed him to grow toward maturity.  In like manner, we must mourn over our own lost innocence to be comforted by God.  Such mourning frees us enter a new life spiritually.

Comfort comes when we realize that someone cares, when someone comes into our darkness, when someone fills the empty space with a loving presence.  Some have experienced God in such a moment of loss, and some have discovered friends.  As we celebrate the birth of Jesus, we should remember that he taught only those who mourn can be comforted (Matthew 5:4), another example of his realism.  While the face of Christmas may be jolly, the heart of Christmas is often sad.  May you be filled with comfort this Christmas.